Monday, September 17, 2012

love is a four-letter word, the concert

Little did I realize that I actually am quite the fan of Mraz. Mr A-Z aside, I have all the other albums and have listened to each and every one of 'em religiously. I actually had to buy ANOTHER 'We sing, We dance, We steal things'  cos I listened to the one I had to its freaking death. I mean he pretty much wrote this song for me. Literally. So you can imagine my absolute excitement to know that Mraz was in town for the new album tour!

Ayo where the hell did time go 'cos his last concert was 3 years AGO. Whaaat?? 0_0

Aisay this album is mush man. Very the blues. Pakcik Mraz is ready to settle down mah hence the vibe. Read somewhere he recently proposed to his long-time girlfriend (also a singer but not feh-mes one).

I went to the concert with Miss TanTan ' cos she was eager to watch Jason perform 'Lucky'  live along with her 2 work bosses who are mega Mraz fans. Kalah aku. I went to Stadium Merdeka in a taxi from work and arrived 2.5 hours early. Everyone in the clinic was in awe of me going to a rock concert on a week day. Woi I'm cool like that OK! So I bought a Ramly burger, 100 plus, sat on the curb.. side prophet *ahem* I digress.. and waited for the rest to arrive.

Waiting for my rocket to come.

Everyone was so young. Goodness gracious.

I bought a concert T-shirt. Original-lah apalagi. When Miss TanTan arrived, we went back to her car so I could change into concert gear! I felt like I was bloody 16 again, stripping at the back seat of the car! Just that instead of Converse sneakers I had orthopaedic shoes on! Heh. We bought the RM200+ tickets ' cos these overused 30-something knees will not be able to last the 2-hour concert without sitting down. When I was young I always wondered apart from lucky ducks, which senior citizen in hell buys those sorta tickets and where is the fun in that?? Well I know now what I didn't know then. And that geriatric fan: it's me-lah.

The concert was SUPER! It was WAYYY better than the last (more songs!) and his performance was mesMRAZing. I was so kiasu that I actually went trawling through the internet in search of his stage setlist and actually found a site that showcased setlists from his shows in Korea and China. He had a brass team and a violinist giving the whole show that ska edge. I was on my feet the entire show and how could you not be when Uncle Mraz goes," Saya berjemput anda semua untuk berdiri dan ber-rock n’ roll dengan saya!” and dove into The Dynamo of Volition. I literally went M-E-N-T-A-L and screamed my lungs out! He had little dance steps and lotsa pelvic moves (ooOOooh... did you not ooOOooh with me?? I said PELVIC... you know pelvic ooOoooh). 

We have the same t-shirt!! We must be soul mates!!

I teared when he sang my favourite song. Ok fine I teared twice. Once during 'A Beautiful Mess' and the other in '93 Million Miles'. I pretty much blacked out the crowd. It was like as if Jason was speaking to me. Indeed I had a Mrazgsm :D Mraz is my F-O-U-R letter word!

dear auntie kim: you jump i jump

Auntie Kim is BACK! It's been awhile since this, this and that. No questions mah, mah no answers-lor.
Anyhooters, turns out this girl msg-ed me on Facebook in March this year but got sent to my spam cos she was not on my friend list. Just found it as I was clearing my inbox today:

Natalia (name changed to protect her privacy):
hi auntie kim... i came across your blog recently when i was googling *bleeep* hospital...

my boyfriend is currently working in o&g posting as a HO in the same hospital. i just wanna understand the current situation in the posting as i couldnt understand his work load and hectic-ness. he completed paeds and surgery posting so far.

1. which is the hardest posting in the hospital?
2. is it so tiring & DEPRESSING during tagging?
3. how is o&g in *bleep* overall? is it stressful?
i hope to hear from you soon because even im depressed. :(frown
thank you so much.
Dear dear Natalia,

So sorry for such a delayed reply. I've only found this as I was clearing out the spam inbox. I do believe it may be too late to discuss this as he's probably done with the posting but I'll just try anyways.

 I would believe during my time, medical was the most difficult posting for me as it was my first posting and we were such freshies. The downside of being an Indon grad is that people pretty much have a stigma against you and it was a struggle to get someone to teach us the ' right' way at the time. We had to suffer some verbal torment as a result. I'm unsure how the situation is like there now as all the MO-s and specialists during my era have transferred. Also the housemen ratio has increased so much since. We used to have a ratio of 1 ho : 40-60 patients. Now it's pretty much 1 ho : 5-10 pt. Still tagging is essentially tagging and it's the crappiest part of being a houseman. It's 2-3 weeks of doing every other day oncalls (if this system still applies) which literally mean you start work at 6am and finish work the next day at 5pm. You do whatever chores that is needed like laundry, chatting with family, dinner etc then sleep and the next day the cycle repeats itself. Most of the time when you are tagging you're the scum of the workforce hierarchy so you get weekend calls and public holidays. If somehow or rather you've pissed your MO off, you get crappier / heavier workload than others. You may think it's unfair but that's how life works in general. It's slightly amplified in medicine because the pressure is high and perfection is required when it comes to dealing with people's lives. It is very tiring because you pretty much have to stay awake and alert for 36 hours or more. Small mistakes = BIG punishment. It is depressing because life pretty much revolves around work and trying HARD to not get into trouble. Also you hardly get any respect from patients, staff, colleagues / bosses and even the cleaners! Heh. It really screws the entire american dream about being a doctor.
As a doctor's girlfriend you will have to learn and practice patience. You may have to be an emotional punching bag sometimes and most of all you will expect alot of disappointments especially during festivals. If this is something you find hard to accept then.. well I need not go further. But if you feel he's a good man and you foresee a wonderful relationship with him then weather this storm. Do your own stuff when he's busy, don't get disappointed if he has to work Valentine's day, listen if he has stuff he needs to let out, bake him cookies (doctors love to eat! it's our only pleasure in life) and most of all offer him encouragement. I can't say the same for others but housemanship changed me. It made me less happy a person but a stronger one inside. You will have to accept these changes.. consider it personal growth.

I'm unsure if this is helpful but I do hope that things take a turn for the better. It's hard to be a doctor's partner (especially if you're not a doctor yourself) but I appreciate everything my then-boyfriend-now-husband has done for me during those dark times.
All the best babydoll.
Sphymo-cuff hugs and syringe kisses, 

Auntie Kimberley

P.S: Although please note that allowing him your shoulder to cry on does NOT mean he can verbally abuse you or put you down. Sorry, just had to post this footnote in. Auntie Kim heavily frowns upon abusive relationships.
P.P.S: Oh and much thanks for reading my blog :Dgrin Makes me *kembang* when readers say hi eheh!

Sunday, September 16, 2012

if you don't like your job, quit.

Did I tell you I quit my job?

No no, I didn't turn into a full-time crafter LOL although *bisou* bonbon has been very helpful in keeping me busy.

People were stunned to know I resigned. I personally didn't think I had it in me to quit my job. I had a RM1400 monthly mortgage and bills to pay. What about shopping??

The old me.

But I was fed up with it all. I was fed up with the way the Klinik Kesihatan was run, my humiliating pay, getting screwed over by colleagues / staff and having a f*cked up boss. I was pissed off that I missed so many of my Gynae appointments to cover the insufficiency in workforce. I am irritated that I'm not preggers. I was tired of b*tching about life and waking up loathing to go to work. I look at Guy and wonder how is it possible to spring up from bed every morning without fail to go to the office? There are times I literally have to pin him down from attending work when he has a fever or is too ill for work. I mean this dude seriously LOVES HIS JOB. I've never felt that: loved my job. You read all these inspirational stories of people like Steve Jobs, James Wong the ethnobotanist, MY DAD *rolling my eyes*, MY HUSBAND... damnit they all LOVE their f*cking jobs! Why don't I love my job? Now that's a million-dollar question.

I've been taking alot of leaves and MCs lately. I refused to see my friends. I was practically living in my Chatuchak harem pants and hardly ventured further beyond my security pants and work baju kurungs. I ate my pain and drowned myself in corn-fructose ecstasy. I didn't give a flying f*ck about my hair. It was the visiting signs of that bad old friend depression (visit no.1: second year medical school, visit no.2: housemanship) and I could feel the melancholy creeping in. But this time I'm older. This time I will control my destiny. This time I can take responsibility over my happiness and well-being. Like Gandalf, I stood on the cliff yelling to Balrog (the mirror image of my depression) "The dark fire will not avail you, Flame of Udun! Go back to the shadow. YOU SHALL NOT PASS!".

I brought this issue up with Guy and my parents. Obviously the thought of passing up a stable 9-5 job seemed like THE CRAZIES to the Baby Boomers. They've lived through 2 economic downturns, working 7 days a week and sometimes more than 12 hours a day only to find their Generation X daughter, of which they've pinned their hopes and dreams into, turning into the grasshopper who sang all summer. But I can't be like them ants. I just cannot. I want more. Dddy came round to the idea in the end. Decisions always feels better when I get their nod of approval. Yalor I'm inferior like that. Then it was the husband. Since we do not the possess the comfortable RM20,000 combined household income needed to cushion this financial blow, the lack of my monthly income would pose as a grave monetary insecurity especially since I contribute to half of the monthly mortgage. We did some calculation and we could not keep afloat for long if I didn't find my means to pay my share. I didn't want to dig too deep into my savings. That was the scariest part. This proved to be more difficult than I thought.

I was supposed to hand in my letter in July just before my vacation but there were some problems with the leave calculation. Suddenly the date had to be pushed forward and last thing I knew it was my last week at work. Blame it on my typical Aries trait, but diving into the unknown has always been a norm. I had no plans. I had no directions. All I thought was "Ayia heck it-lah.. already come so far. WING IT saja!"

This is the first time my life was to be governed by nobody but me. I call the shots and I make the decisions. It's pretty much a logarithmic graph: work hard, get more money thus can play hard (and refurbish house... man I cannot stand the interiors left by the previous owners already!). Milestone, memang pun milestone.

Disclaimer: images courtesy of Ecards, Chloe Clam, unknown

Saturday, September 01, 2012

evangelione: portraits in the queen's garden

I would have loved to attend this exhibition. Evangelione, your dolls have got a hold on my heart.

My favourite is the bumble bee.

Disclaimer: all images courtesy of Evangelione

Thursday, July 05, 2012

handmade kl craft party: teapot succulent garden

It's the time of the year again when Murni of MimpiMurni hosts yet another fabulous crafting shebang! It's certainly something I look forward to annually and it totally bums me out when I can't make it. I've been to her decoupage and t-shirt refashion craft party which were the shizzles to my dizzles (I have no idea what I meant by that.. I assume it's Snoop talk for 'the bees knees')! I cut Anti-Aging class for crafting class. Guess that says alot about me!

Trust me I, too, never knew what a succulent was. I know what a cactus is. I know we use the word 'succulent' to describe juicy steak or watery fruits like papayas. Turns out succulents are cactus cousins but they ain't got no thorns and their fleshy parts are known to retain water. They're popular as ornamental plants 'cos they look really bizarre and cute and are supposedly pretty hardy.. being able to survive in dry areas and all. But you know me-lah, I've got what people call a black thumb. Nothing flora thrives, heck, nothing flora SURVIVES under my care ever! Hardy ke tak hardy hmm.. nahas any plants that goes under my care!

The variety of succulents are astounding. Look what Murni let us choose from. I had no idea where to start!

Clockwise from top Left: Murni's work (so nice hor?), Murni showing us the ropes... *sigh* she makes it look all too easy, my table spread: big rocks little rocks..

The fun part was curating the succulent arrangements. The not-so-fun part was packing the earth in with the spoon. and blowing out the free soil. 

I took a flag outta the mini burgers (wondermilk snacks which were YUM) and stuck it into my teapot garden. What a difference a flag makes!

Look at the Jiar sisters of Trendy Confession giving some serious blow job (pun intended lol)!

Checkout the winner of 'Most Creative': Li!

Hey hey hey guess who's Miss Congeniality?? :) C'est moi *sheepish* 

Oooh how succulent is this tea??  Crafting makes people happy!

Another spectacular Craft Party by Murni. I think I can safely say on behalf of others that we had a tremendously good time! I know I did!

Get updates about Handmade KL Craft Parties (*click here*) and/or join their mailing list!

P.S. Disclaimer: Certain images courtesy of Handmade KL

Sunday, June 03, 2012

i tres must have this: ladurée x hello kitty

I'll probably miss this by the time I get to Paris in summer (yes, I'm going.. AGAIN) which is a real shame 'cos take a look at this! Isn't this tres excellént?? Love it love it love it!

What happens when macaron mogul collaborates with kawaii kitty?? An explosion of Ladurée x Hello Kitty candylicious stationery and macaron boxes! Look at that pop-up box. Wonderful, just wonderful.

Saturday, June 02, 2012

break the cervical cancer silence

(another very belated post... eek!)

It's the time of the month again and I'm not talking about your menses. I attended the launch of Power Over Cervical Cancer (POCC) and this year the theme is Breaking The Silence. 

As a POCC blogger ambassador and even more so as a doctor, I cannot stress enough on the importance of pap smears. 

"Basically what POCC wants to do is to highlight the subject of cervical cancer and inform people of ways to prevent it. You can take a jab of HPV vaccine or/and most importantly get a pap smear examination. Seriously my corny words seem so intelligent now: don't be ignorant. If it's time to get a pap, go get it. It's not a taboo anymore. Not since The Pill was invented. With liberation comes consequences and if you're having sex, you bloody should take care of your cervix and get it checked. You service your car, don't you?? You get a blood test ever once in awhile right?? So why don't you examine your precious little cervix? You're gonna need it 'till the end of time... and it's not like some f*cked-up carburator that you can just pluck out and replace!" Read more on my previous post here.

Say it with me ladies, 'Don't be a fool. Protect your tool.' 

That's Ms Rubi-Ain of National Cancer Society Malaysia along with Dr Dalilah and GSK ripping a band-aid out of Rina's mouth! 

Sarimah did a wonderful job hosting the event along with the other POCC ambassadors: Genevieve Sambhi, Vanessa and Pamela Chong.

A group picture with the Pink Ladies. Tough as nails women who have battled cancer and lives to tell their harrowing story. 

It wasn't my smoothest moment but I just had to tell Genevieve Sambhi that I've retold her story many a time when giving cervical cancer awareness talks to the patients and people of my community clinic. She does serve to be an inspiration to us all. 

Cervical cancer trivia that I learnt during the campaign (I wouldn't trust a doctor who claims to know EVERYTHING. We don't. There's always something new to be learnt because our business it's a lifelong learning business. Trust a doctor who recognizes his/her shortcomings but is willing to find out the truth):

- Worldwide, one woman dies of cervical cancer every 2 minutes
- Cervical cancer is the 3rd commonest female cancer in Malaysia
- 99.7% of cervical cancers are caused by the Human Papilloma Virus (HPV)
- HPV can be transmitted via sexual (sexual intercourse, genital-genital, manual-genital, oral-genital) and non-sexual routes: extra-genital (undergarments, contaminated medical tools?) and vertical (mother-child)
- 80% of women will acquire HPV infections throughout their lives as penetrative intercourse is not necessary for infection
- Every sexually-active woman is at risk of acquiring an oncogenic (meaning cancer-causing) HPV infection

Get a HPV vaccine. Get a pap smear. Take a POCC pledge here. Educate your family and friends. Break the silence.

Friday, June 01, 2012

the BFM interview

(a very belated post)

It must be the power of affirmation or divine intervention because I was on NATIONAL freaking RADIO!!
Goodness gracious, you have no idea how many times I’ve muttered to myself, yelled in the shower or exclaimed to my friends that I wish*bisou* bonbon could get air time. So you can imagine my delightful surprise (well, shell-shocked really) when I received an email from BFM 89.9 that they’d like to have me in for a session with Freda Liu on their show ‘Open For Business’. Needless to say I leaped at the opportunity!

Turns out, the producer for ‘Open For Business’ had sampled some *bisou* bonbon products in Kaleidoscope and liked them! It’s such joy to learn that people like / love my products. I’d probably tear if I continue on this note. Like other makers who take pride in their craft, it’s the biggest compliment of all when people tell me they enjoy my product. Perhaps so much blood, sweat and tears have gone into *bisou* bonbon that I can’t help but feel so strongly about each and every one of my products. Anyhoots, I was given a sample of potential questions to answer and ultimately my homework was to listen to past shows. It was intimidating going through the string of podcasts of entrepreneurs who were on the show. There were alot of established businessmen + woman featured on ‘Open for Business’ and I’m thinking to myself “Whoah where do *bisou* bonbon belong in this sea of Titans?” That and “Man everyone sounds so darn intellectual.”

I'm at BFM 89.9! Wooot!!

There was no time for self-doubt obviously what with the interview just days ahead and so many more podcasts to go through. I didn’t sleep well the night before. Fearful that I would f*ck the interview up and appear to be an airhead on national freaking radio! Miss ChongChong had a tip for me ‘cos afew of her bosses have been on BFM 89.9: don’t say “uh...” ‘cos it sounds darn annoying on air. I arrived crazy early and took the lift to BFM 89.9’s office. A show was going on and everyone else was busy doing their own thingy. Freda came to my rescue. She was a fiery dynamic character and awfully nice. I probably looked like a deer in the headlight. She reassured me that everything would go along well. We were seated in the (airtime?) room and Freda explained regarding the basic use of headphones etc. The rest went by in a flash. I only have mere pockets of hazy memories of how everything went down.  And did I hold my ‘uh-s’? Nay, I let ‘em rip like machine guns :D And I’m reminded by them every time I play the podcast *cringe*

After the interview, I went back to the car, blasted 'Moves Like Jagger' out LOUD, did an upper body dougie and a 1-man mexican wave!!

This marked an important milestone for *bisou* bonbon. I would like to offer my heartfelt thanks to Adeline and Freda at BFM 89.9 for taking such a warm interest in us and most of all to everyone who have supported *bisou* bonbon & *bisou* rose from the start and especially those who still do. We would not have been able to be where we are if not for your support. Thank you very much again.

(Haiya... see I’m tearing again...)

Thursday, May 31, 2012

but you're just a..

"You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cos you've taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed..."

Not sure what’s happening with men nowadays.

Someone in my workplace is getting a divorce. I’m unsure if she will go through with it in the end or he’d somehow manage to charm her back into the relationship. She’s been trying to have a child for what seems like forever. She’s gone through some of the works but could not proceed further as her husband refuses to participate in further investigations (sperm counts etc). He is seemingly confident with his fertility status as this is his 2nd marriage and he had a couple of children in his previous marriage. Being uncooperative is one thing but being downright insulting is another. In the heat of one of their numerous arguments, he called her a barren imbecile.

Barren imbecile.

Men. Read those two words carefully. Is this what you would ever want your father to say to your mother? Is this what you would ever want your son-in-law to tell your future daughters? Think again before you speak. Yell AAARGH or FUCKKKK (or ‘insert choice of swear’) but think twice before you spit out such unimaginable disasters.

I used to be so afraid of getting pregnant. Terrified. And even though Guy was the only man I ever f*cked but pre-maritally I used to be scared sh*tless of getting knocked up. We’d take full precaution and I’ve even downed the morning after pill a couple of times. Then I decided to abstain from pregnancy during the first year of marriage firstly to feel the relationship out (call me practical) and to adjust with the new working place, home and concentrate on my budding business. Now that it’s approaching my 2nd year anniversary, I’m sure many are curious to know if I’m pregnant. I’m not yet pregnant, just FAT I tell them. We’ve started unprotected sex about 10 months ago and it definitely has not been easy. I now understand as a woman of this century why it can be difficult to have a bun in the oven. You know how you’re introduced to a so-and-so and it is always in their personality description that they are infertile. They don't go "Oh and that's Mrs So-and-so. She's an equestrian and has a penchant for Doc Martens." instead... they go, "Oh and that's Mrs So-and-so. She doesn't have any children." I’ve seen these people around me and it just never occurred to me that I maybe approaching that category. And what disappoints me the most is that among the chaos and all the other achievements that is expected of me, I should also be able to bear a child. And I’m supposedly NO woman if I fail to do so.

Here we are the women of the NOW who are expected to bring home half the bacon, support half the housing mortgage, have a personality AND continue the age-old chores of cooking, cleaning and caring for the kids. We are asked of too much, don’t you think?

I told herthat it’s time to let the sadness end. There’s no point in continuing the relationship if he refuses to compromise and treats you like dirt. Our parents did not raise us daughters this way for us to be stepped on like scum when we, too, bring money to the table. What’s life about if all you feel when you go home is misery? I’m always the sort to perk up and rush to the front of the line when it’s balik-rumah time. I cannot imagine a life of one who dreads going home. It’s just something I cannot fathom. Home is supposed to be our sanctuary and panic room. She is starting to look for a room outside. I told her to cut down on expenditure and leave within her means but also to take up a money-generating hobby. She enjoys mixing drinks so I told her to look for a part-time job as a bartender. Do something that herself happy but yet generates some revenue albeit small. It’s time to live life for herself. Not for any other. It’s time to get happy. I wish her the best.

As for me, it’s time for me to step up to the plate and try to get pregnant. Thank goodness Guy (bless his soul) has never pressured me on this issue but I’m very sure he, too, looks forward to a child. I’ve taken the first step to get my in-denial-self enrolled in the infertility clinic. And my HSG appointment is next. Making more time and energy for sex. Putting world domination aside and this baby-making business a priority. And trying very much to let loose. Goodness gracious never thought that getting preggers could be difficult.. I always thought it would be a walk in the park! Heh.

Sunday, April 29, 2012

last week shelbinstagramd

Made the husband a low-calorie fat-free dinner.

My clittoria is doing fine. Thanks to the husband's green thumb.

I ♥ Las Vacas, Mont Kiara grain fed rib eye.  

From the KL hoods to home.

Problem with not having a 'nose' is your face mask rests on your lower eye lid!

Mother's Day brunch @ Li Yen, Ritz Carlton. Peking duck is my fave.

It's all about superfood these days. The goji and pomegranate ones were yum!

A 'bring sexy back' soap  A *bisou* bonbon limited edition.

Toto I don't think we're in Setapak anymore..!

Things have been abit gloomy lately so a sunday morning flower bath to cleanse & brighten the aura is essential!

Mandi bunga time...

♥ foccacia cheese sandwich made by bff with love...
HEART PART (part fork-knife-scoop) available at *bisou* rose.

I also ♥ Prosecco with strawberry bits!

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