Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Thursday, April 19, 2007

suddenly irritated

I cannot sabar. I cannot. Just holding back the tears, anger and frustration. In its place my shelbysweets demeanour: game face. I really admire my ability to PRETEND sometimes.

Today is NOT a good day. I know I whine way too much in comparison to the effort I put in to make life better. Perhaps everything IS my fault, perhaps I'm to blame for my own damn misery.. I mean I'm the one who decides to feel poorly about whatever and I don't exactly try that hard to improve the situation. But today *sigh* TODAY just let me complain puh-lease. Tolong tolong, seriously, tolong.

First of all I f*cked up my first bed-side teaching wit Dr Pra. A lot of my physical examination techniques are beyond perfection and I had trouble determining the heart borders as well as performing (shifting-dullness) percussion. Noone bothered to tell me that my case was a COPD (Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease) patient so I came ill-prepared with a brain as empty as a Somalian rice bowl. Brilliant right?? The thing that irritated me the most was that I wish I had gotten all these training much earlier especially before my exam the other day. Now I know how much I probably f*cked up on Monday and it makes me feel crummier than ever. GREAT! Now he wants to continue the discussion of my case tomorrow but I "jaga" tonight (shift exchange 'cos the girl today is ill and me being the good samaritan that I am, I relented to her pleas). So I won't be studying altogether that much either. He is SO gonna form a crappy first impression of me-lah. There goes my BST marks! Then there's crap news 'bout the remains of our internship. Hospitals in Sukabumi and Subang recently made it into the satellite hospital list. Bloody f*ck! Those places are FAR and freakin' villages. It's bad enough the program has to proceed another 5 months in Indon, what's worse is that it has to proceed in an Indon village!! M*cha*ha*!! I know, this, very juvenile mentality.. I DON'T CARE!! ENOUGH OF THIS PLACE!! ENOUGH!! ENOUGH OF BEING AWAY!! ENOUGH!! I'm within micrometres of my patience threshold and if something radical (such as the management being human enough to allow us to continue the final semester back home in Malaysia) doesn't happen I believe there's a big possibility I might spontaneously combust!! Not in a good, The Amazing Four, way. In a charcoal-cremate-to-ashes way. Not even a Chanel Lucky Charm purse can save me!! To add insult to injury, i'm not thin. I might have lost A (singular, one, uno) kilogram but, seriously, what's a f*cking kg anyway? A small bag of sugar? Quarter a watermelon maybe. Aaah nothing-lah!!

I'm fuming inside and everything is irking me properly. Why am I such an unfortunate clown?? Why won't Lady Luck make my month and shower me with some Shelbulous news? The least she can do is let me go home for abit.

Something is wrong with me. I don't even shop. Hehe actually I think there's nothing I wish to buy here kut. But I used to buy crap 3 times a week to cope with the pressure. Now I pass Carla Gallery (Korea / China "mari" PM boutique) by without dropping by to see what's new. Althoughhh.. I'm dying to get my hands on something Giles for New Look or KateMoss Topshop or Thakoon for Gap or Karl Lagerfeld K but that’s besides the point ‘cos since I’m not in the freaking U of K I’m nowhere near anything that screams budget designer.

So really... something is wrong.

Monday, April 16, 2007

make believe birthday

The day starts breezily slow as all my ideal birthdays do *wink*. I wake up not to the shrieking of an alarm clock but because I feel like opening my eyes to a brand new day: a day that celebrates me. It feels delightful to creep out of the covers smiling (inside and outside). It’s one of those days I feel so fortunate to be alive. I run myself a bath with candles (despite the sunlight streaming in!!) and breathe in the lavender emanating from my marble old English tub. My maid walks in with a small breakfast snack of spinach quiche, oatmeal-and-raisin scone and a glass of freshly-squeezed orange juice (with pulp of course!!). She sets it by the tub and immediately I sashay my Chinese yet Latino-like bottom towards the munchies and start cramming the pastry down my throat. I’ve recently developed a penchant for sweet scones.

As I pat my body down with a fluffy Jasper Conran towel I potter towards my bedroom where I put on this mega-bizarre-yet-highly-fascinating Deborah Lindquist number comprising of, get this, hemp-and-cotton-blend dress with raffia and organic cotton lace trim. It makes me feel like I’m Captain Planet’s mistress :) I prance towards my dresser and slide open my Anna Sui vanity drawer set revealing my collection of Sonia Rykiel leather and plastic hair slides. I choose the purple chrysanthemum and fix it on the right parting of my hair. I slip on my Links Evil Eye ring and fix Lulu Frost’s Ecology earrings to the lobes of my ear. I’m SO LOVING EVERYTHING ALEXANDER MCQUEEN this season. THAT AND PERSPEX. Combine them both and you get a lethal dose of Alexander McQueen’s Perspex and silk sandals. On the way out I grab my Vuitton satin shopper and my purple Marc Jacobs patchwork crocodile bag. Dressed to conquer the world!!

First activity of the day, meeting up with an old friend, Peter Callesen, to see his newest work: a fairytale castle cut from a single sheet of paper. He tells me I was the muse to this piece (that to his was his birthday gift to me: artists can be such cheapskates!!) because I can be such a princess sometimes. The gallery thunders with my laughter. He is such a drama queen!!

We head over to the Rolling Greens Nursery where our mutual new-found-friend Danny Seo awaits us amidst bushes of English roses. Danny’s an eco-stylist and he presents me with an orchid potted with cacti and recycled sea glass (the same one he picked out for Kerry Washington 2 weeks ago). I squeal in delight ‘cos I’ve been wanting one of those since forever. It rocks to be a birthday girl!!

I realize that evening was approaching and headed home to get changed. Purple is the theme today and I slipped into a charmeuse and lace Valentino. That, along with switching my Lulu Frost for a pair of JAR Paris, the Evil Eye for a Tiffany & Co Celebration Ring in diamond and rose diamond as well as Links Watch Over Me necklace. Anna Molinari Perspex (EVERYONE CHEER WITH ME: PERSPEX POWER!!) suede leather pumps complete the twinkle toes and I hurry over to The Rose Bakery in Dover Street Market where a warm company of good friends, colleagues and eccentric art folks awaits me and my Alexander McQueen flower-trim clutch. I’m so excited because they opened late for my dinner party and a feast of Swedish cuisine was to be served on (loaned) Hermés china. They even had cute Eric Buterbaugh centrepieces in pink. Darlings!!

After dessert and way too much rose champagne, we treaded off to Audrey Kawasaki’s workshop and she presents me with her rendition of fiery-headstrong Aries me. It’s brilliant!! Exquisite and brilliant!! A little hydrocephalic with the sunset eyes and empty gaze but absolute brilliance nonetheless. We all cheered and headed to a nearby pub (with a dance floor) where we ended the night with a cab ride home *bisou*

Aaah fantasy birthday gifts… my favourite part!!

The Past, Present, Future necklace

Juicy Couture Day Dreamer terry bag

An Indian star tortoise: Thalamus II

Fendi Crossword Grande in silver

P.S, disclaimer: images courtesy of Elle UK April 2007, Vogue UK April 2007, Elle USA May 2007.

fantasy birthday gifts cont..

Neisha Crossland lamp in Berry

Marni cotton-and-leather bag in white

Thakoon for Manolo Blahnik patent leather pumps

Rodarte lacquered jacket

Laduree crystallized violet candies

Tim Gunn's 'A Guide to Quality, Taste & Style'

Dior Backstage Eye Show cream in Pop Aquadelic, Undressed Beige and Pink Wannabe

Dr Andrew Weil for Origins Mega-Mushroom Remover pads

H&M neon dress

Juicy Couture Her Majesty boyshorts

Vuitton Hudson

Juicy Couture charm bracelet (love this: it incorporates all the elements I fancy in a charm)

Guerlain Imperiale eye and lip cream

Marc Jacobs Kristen bag

Tesco Florence & Fred dress (so nurse!! KAKAKA)

Alexander McQueen ruffled top

Sonia Rykiel clear rose hairslide

Chloe nude leather clutch

Phillip Lim denim dress

Loewe Napa.aire bag in purple or grey

Etro silk-mix sundress
… Fergie, Glamourous …

P.S, disclaimer: images courtesy of E Luxury, Elle UK April 2007, Vogue UK April 2007, Elle USA May 2007

Sunday, April 15, 2007

tall-dude it's my birthday you're gonna party like it's my birthday

Delusion of grandeur ( : (grăn'jər, -jʊr') n.: A delusion in which one believes oneself possessed of great importance, power, wealth, intellect, or ability.

Starting with a kick-ass breakfast at Mie Tek-Tek or as we have come to affectionately call 'Tek-Tek noodles' when actually the name of the tiny corner is Warung LiLi's.

I HEART Teh Botol Sosro. Mornings would be much much more tragic without it.

Ruang Anggrek aka Orchid Ward which explains the blatant deco.

Face is abit round ah? Kinda paranoid since the Silbutramine.

Bought everyone a round of strawberry juice since it's my birthday and pink is the theme. I made everyone pucker up on the straws. So the F.R.I.E.N.D.S hor?

Miss IznaIzna thinks I'm such a nutter for making them do weird poses. I don't care. It's my birthday I'm the princess and my wish is their command.

Since the dreaded Long Case exam was in a couple of days I decided to put a pause on celebrations and just take pictures to commemorate the day I turn old *hiccup* I mean 17. So Miss MasMas pulled out afew used old cones and we took photos just because... After we were done with that, we ordered Indian delivery and headed back to our respective rooms to do work. Doctors are supremely party people, I kid you not!!

Smile if you think I'm really actually 16!!

Saturday, April 14, 2007

forever21 wishlist

OK-lah not that much of a mega-list after all now when I think of it. Forever21 please love me long time and do yourself some publicity by sending these (in size M/L - yes-lah I'm size L, no point asking for weeny clothes that I can't wear just to save grace) my way. I asked so please let me get :)

P.S, disclaimer: images courtesy of Forever21

forever21 + 5 = 17 YEARS OLD!!

I say:

There are like so many things I need from Forever21. For those who would like to contribute to the Shelbulous Birthday Registry... look out for my FOREVER21 WISHLIST :)
P.S, disclaimer: image courtesy of Forever21

Friday, April 13, 2007

(in space voice): nuffnang, we have a problem!

I don't understand but I just CANNOT paste that nuffnang ad onto the sidebar thing. And I've tried it a million times here, there, everywhere. When I preview.. *zip* NOTHING!! I'm getting so frustrated because the Blogger tutorial they offer is kind of umm misleading(??) and weird and uncomprehendable by a person like me who knows absolutely NUTS about html. And my email to their administration keeps getting UNDELIVERED. WTF?? Why is the world against me on this?? It's my freakin' birthday tomorrow and Long Case is on Monday. Can't someone up there just give me a f*cking break??

And I might totally be losing out on winning a pink PSP.


P.S: Where got easy??

Thursday, April 12, 2007

when we do nothing, we do nothing at all

Today's MOVING DAY. For the hospital... well, Internal Medicine department at least. Since we're interns (free labour?? Holler!!) we have been called upon to offer our services as porter / usherer / nurses(??) / all of the above to get patients from one side of the wing to the other. At least we get to ponteng polyclinic duties legitimately. Yeayyy!!

Wahh patient gets new fresh gears. That and fresh new sheets and fresh new everything.

Everyone's happy when there's fresh new NEWs!!

Ah Bi does amateur photography real good. We made him do pictures of us. You'd think us too busy to even breathe in Internal Med(??). Hell NO. Nobody in Indon says no to free photography. It's in their genes. And in mine. This is how Ah Dho's turned out to be.

I took some behind-the-scenes with my Dopod. The resolution is crap but you get the idea. Never thought it would be THIS difficult to take a picture. But it takes much more than just good equipment, fine weather, skills, co-operative models, venue, lighting, uncontrollable circumstances, etc...

L-R: Ah Ij, Miss IznaIzna, Ah Irs

Instruct instruct instruct until he berpeluh-peluh.

But worth it in the end. L-R: Miss WuWu, Miss RusRus, Miss CiCi. I think they look splendid!!

I think they both got the best pose of all. Ah Handa was so worried he'd disappear into the background given his coal-toned skin.

L-R: Ah Ro, Ah Handa

Look how he transformed this meager of a shot (with our dahhhling preceptor Dr RahGu) to...

THIS MASTERPIECE. I've yet to learn much more Adobe from my master.

And finally...

Susah siut jadi model. I never really thought it was this much work. Ah Bi really wanted to get the PERFECT shot of me but I was way too stiff (kaku) and somehow I did not look at all flattering in most of his pictures. There goes me modelling career!! I really expected more from myself. I mean where did the photogenicity go to when I needed it the most?? Must learn more poses. And must get a jawline!!

Now comes the nothing-to-do-so-we-shall-take-pictures moments. We love Ah Bi and his camera. Nobody is so willing to take pictures more than him. We most obviously obliged.

Corridors of the hospital. We just came from Dahlia ward.

Finally, my favourite shot OF ALL.

This was spontaneous and you can see what a productive intern I am.
Remember: every moment is a lipgloss moment!!

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