Friday, November 24, 2006

crap de la crap

Just woke up from a 2 hour nap. Waiting for the clock to strike 10pm so I can really begin to rest. G*ddd I’m tired. Today has been crazy. Crazy enough for me to have to skip Pilates & gym for it. The night before we all got the message that there was gonna be an exhumation in Garut (approx 2 – 3 hr drive from Bandung) at 6 this morning. So when I woke up to switch the lights off (sometimes I accidentally sleep with the lights on ‘cos I’m too tired to switch them off – someone help me fix a clapper puh-lease!! –) at 4 in the morning I figured I was safe enough to sleep (the ultimate sleep is sleeping in the dark definitely) for another hour at least. I was SO wrong. 10 minutes into my snuggle the Teriyaki Boyz’ Tokyo Drift scratched through the silence. I figured it was probably Ah Hathir or Miss RusRus reminding me ‘bout the exhumation at 6 but instead Ah Hathir belted out, “Autopsy NOW!”


This on-call business is TOTALLY NOT FUN.
F*ck. It was a hit-n-run case which took place at the Padaleunyi toll gate. His entire skull and right thigh were crushed. And when I say crushed I really mean so crushed that his bones were shattered into bits and pieces. He came in such a contorted position where his legs were folded over his head that they found bits of his brain in his thigh muscles. It was definitely a sight to behold first thing in the morning. We quickly got to working and were done by 7am. The exhumation case had abit of release difficulties due to miscommunication between their police departments and was then postponed to tomorrow.

The preparation for the seminar started on full swing today, yet despite running here and there all over town for briefings on my role as the masters of ceremony part liaison officer, I’m still clueless on what I’m supposed to do. I’m lucky Ah Fit is with me in this so he can help me get a grip of the situation. He’s to be the Indon speaker and I’m the English speaker. There’s this lady who was supposed to guide us through the entire process and she started making all these statements on how the English has to be oh-so halus (cos we’re dealing with Aussies, Singaporeans and Malaysian doctors, official personnel etc worrr *gag*) and blablabla… like she so the f*ck ass ch*ba* frefessionuh (professional). I mean, like, OK whatever but she and that forensic doctor went and, like, made snide innuendoes regarding Malaysian English and I’m, like, WHOAH WHOAH wait a minute!! Just ‘cos you f*cking go to thousands of dollars worth of English classes with freakin’ native speakers does NOT f*cking make you a Harvard English professor so bloody lay of the sarcasm man!! I mean who in the f*cking world opens a ceremony with “I wish to convey my welcome…” anyway?!! Wish to convey welcome?? WTF?!! *rolls eyes* Gimme a break-lah…!! Oh-so-halus konon… oh-so-the-wrong-grammar more like it. After hours of running around I thought we were done for the day since it was so late in the evening. I was dying to get out of my clothes and jump into bed. But just as we walked out of the hotel lobby (seminar location), my Dopod rang.


Ya ampun 3 bodies (sudden death, train accident and murder) lagi!! This was gonna take all blimin’ day-lah ayo..!! All of us moaned the entire way to the morgue. 4 cadavers in a day. This has gotta be a freakin’ record-lah. The sudden death was an old bag lady. Since she had no identity they drained her and filled her up with Formalin to be shipped off to our med school’s Anatomy department. I didn’t really notice the train accident much ‘cos my group was in charge of the murder case. I was in charge of fashion: meaning the measurements and detailing of victim’s clothes and accessories. It’s pretty long-winded stuff having to take measurements of every hem to every pocket to every design print to every label to ayia so many-lah. The victim was a 15-year-old boy who got into a fight with his friend. His internal examination showed no abnormalities but when they cracked his skull open, blood splashed onto the ceramic tiling. He died of subdural hematoma: brain hemorrhage. People were making a hooha over him ‘cos inside his wallet he carried a love-letter from his chick. Oh what it must be like to be in puppy-love :)

Now I understand how come it’s so important to have cadavers as a teaching aid during basic theory years. Unfortunately for us we didn’t have such luxuries. I think only in America and India do they provide a cadaver per student couple. Must have been so exciting to study from the real thing. Trust me, it makes a whole world of difference. It’s only now that I really get to see, touch and feel our internal organs. Holding the human brain my hands was surreal. That and prodding the kidney and pinching the liver and slapping the lungs about. Seriously, whoah. Tru (of Tru Calling) definitely made the right choice by interning in the morgue. I’m not surprised she aced her class despite being on night shifts and saving all those lives. It’s just different when you get to handle real organs rather than just memorizing them out of a book.

Ah Dass and Miss BahBah were feeling a lil’ rundown with everything. They found it bizarre that the morgue cleaners seem so at ease with sawing off skulls and chopping out chest cavities. Adoi morgue cleaners are so used to it: it’s like cleaning fish to them-lah probably. Yalor the kids are still freshies-lah. I told them it affected me big time back when I was still new (especially in Surgery and all that). Now I’m just numb. It has become more of a job. Sounds so apathic but that’s how you’ve got to be in order to stay sane throughout the entire experience. The moment I walk out of the hospital vicinity I leave it all behind and I walk into MY world *shrug*. If I’m gonna take all the pressure and sorrow home with me I’ll end up being a wreck for sure.

So my room’s a mess and I’m too lazy to clean up the mess. Miss KosKos wonders how I intend to bring boys back to my place if I allow it to remain in such a state. I know: I don’t bring boys to my room-loh.
Time to sleep. Got exhumation tomorrow. Better go charge my iPod.

P.S: Now I know-ah how come doctors absolutely despise being on-call. Seriously-lah no life.

P.P.S: Parents now you know that kids fighting can kill. Prevent this.


mylias said...

Location:Bandung (Indonesia), Selangor, Malaysia

That is funny! Malaysia? Indonesia? Hah!

shelbybaby said...

mylias: *giggle* technical mistake although i'm literally from 2 places..

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