Friday, May 05, 2006

old maid

I was watching episode ' ' on House M.D when I experienced an epiphany. I got a case pretty similar to that: this chick entered the ultrasound room in Cibabat hospital with a midwife. Her medical record revealed that she was still unmarried meaning there is a gynecological problem with her but they're not allowed to perform a speculum examination 'cos it's invasive thus the next form of diagnostic tool viable is the ultrasound. She was 21 years old and had a look on her face that I couldn't begin to describe. As Dr Zul (consultant) scanned her lower abdomen, there popped a fetus on the screen. I was kinda delighted 'cos it was my first ultrasound experience and watching the lil' punk the size of a peanut swimming about, twirling round and round... damn the cute and super cool. I looked over to the chick and she was expressionless: blank and unfazed. Suddenly I realized, OMG she doesn't want the baby and the ultrasound has just confirmed her fears. Damn. Dr Zul was asking her if she already had a marriage candidate in mind and she nodded. He congratulated her for conceiving. [KAKAKA, right, like she had a fiance in mind. If she did, he'd be here with her right now and she wouldn't have been staring up at the ceiling instead of looking at the screen] That's really basically how you know it's an unwanted pregnancy when the mother-to-be doesn't even wanna look at her kid's ultrasound images. Dr Zul measured the crown-rump length to estimate the fetal age and it was approximately 18 weeks old. Immediate newsflash: it's a little too late to abort. Minutes later, Dr Zul invited her mother to join our little tea-party. The moment she walked past the door I could see the mother was expecting the worst. Her eyes were puffy as if she had been crying. She looked like she just lost RM300,000 in Genting's casino. Dr Zul congratulated the mother as well. She remained quiet. When Dr Zul finished explaining about the baby on screen, he turned to leave. The chick called out to him and asked if it was possible to get rid of it. He exclaimed in horror, "Look at this beard of mine: it's as white as snow. So please don't even let me hear what you just said. Firstly it's against the law. Secondly it's against Allah's wishes. I could go to hell for that. Please don't even start." He then turned to the mother, "But I thought she has a man to take responsibility for this?" The mother proceeded to reply in Bahasa Sunda. I didn't understand exactly what she said but I got the basic gist of things: there is no man 'cos she can't remember who's responsible for the pregnancy and even if she did the boy probably kabur (cabut / escape) liao. Man it sure sucks to be her mother.
Miss RusRus and Miss MuMu were terpinga-pinga (befuddled) in the room. I mean, I understand even lesser of Sundanese but I could totally get the situation. Aiii my group mates, my group mates *shakes head* they're so ignorant I don't know if it's charming or just plain DUNZO of 'em. I explained to them what I interpreted of the situation and it left them in absolute awe. Ayia a small piece of sinetron (soap opera) for the day. Everyone was puzzled on how come I was so comfortable regarding the issue. For starters, we're doctors, so crazy sh*t like this is abundant and we should learn to expect it. Furthermore, I do know 'bout crazy sh*t 'cos I see a lot of it happen around people I know. I guess our environments are different.

Everyone asked me how come I could still remain a virgin despite. I don't know. I suppose I've always feared these sorta mistakes. For all the times my father brought home horror stories of teenage pregnancies, single mothers and STDs that he gathered during his travelling days as a medical representative, I swore never to bring such tragedies upon my family. Anyway I was not popular with the boys so in a sense it came as a blessing in disguise. I want fun but I fear premarital sex. I'm such a conservative frigid. Crap. KAKAKA. I can still remember after making out with those cute English boys in clubs back in the UK, and things would begin to get hot and heavy, I'd make an excuse to visit the loo and quickly make my way to the cloak room instead. Seconds later, I'm on a cab home and the poor bugger's probably thinking I'm taking a long dump in the ladies. Furthermore I always made sure my mates knew that despite ANYTHING I leave for home with them. So that's why I'm such a spinster. I know loadsa chicks who got themselves boys after a night's hump. I don't know why I can't just be open-minded enough regarding this matter. I'm creating my spinster self(!!). *sigh* I gain some I lose some *shrugs*

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